Provo MTC: Lead, Kindly Light...

The MTC...what an experience! Being surrounded by thousands of young men and women anxious to get out and preach the Gospel was amazing. But before the MTC, there was the heart breaking moments of "See ya in two years!"

Saying goodbye to the family was pretty tough, especially to my nephews and nieces. I remember dropping off one of my nephews at his school that morning and giving him a final hug. I watched him trod off slowly, his heavy backpack swaying as he moved, head sunk down crying. For anyone who has spent more than five minutes with me, you know exactly what I did...bawled like a baby. Talk about a tear jerker...

A few hours later I was thrown in the mix of the MTC, and I soon found out what my mission was going to be like. All the sadness of saying goodbye was swallowed up in the joy of meeting a group of Elders that has changed my life. I hadn't spent very much time around other active LDS people up to that point in my life. It was an eye opener to have 7 exemplary Elders show me that Mormons aren't as bad as I thought. In fact, they are pretty legit! (Confusing? maybe, but I was inactive most of my life.) My MTC experience was incredible to say the least. The growth in testimony: the friendships forged; the genuine fun had was a springboard propelling me into this awesome mission adventure.

Like I said, I wasn't very active before my mission, so I didn't know many hymns. Luckily, Elder Houston, my missionary companion in the MTC (and later on...we'll get there) is an amazing singer and introduced me to quite a few goodies. One in particular reminds me of the MTC every time I hear it: "Lead, Kindly Light".

"Lead, kindly light amid the encircling gloom; lead thou me on! The night is dark and I am far from home, lead thou me on! Keep thou my feet; I do not ask to see the distant scene one step enough for me."

This verse describes pretty well how I felt going into the MTC. I didn't know what to expect, and it was so hard for me to finally get there. But I wanted to do what the Lord wanted me to do. I asked for His help, and He got me there. I was finally saying to the Good Shepard, "I'll go where you want me to go..." (I still struggle with wanting to see the distant scene though...haha).

"I was not ever thus, nor prayed that thou shouldst lead me on. I loved to choose and see my path; but now, lead thou me on! I loved the garish day, and, spite of fears, pride ruled my will. Remember not past years."

 I've said it many times before: I never wanted to go on a mission growing up. It wasn't a thought for me. I was going to do what I wanted to do, and for a long time I did. I lived a life contrary to the commandments of God, and with that came consequences that were more than I could handle alone. I thank God every day that He opened my eyes and gave me this chance to change. It was in the MTC that I gained a testimony that the only way to true joy and happiness is through Jesus Christ. I'm grateful He 'remember(s) not past years'.

"So long thy power hath blest me, sure it still will lead me on o'er moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent, till the night is gone. And with the morn those angel faces smile, which I have loved long since, and lost a while!"

Although the MTC was incredibly fun and uplifting, it was full of challenges as well. I missed my nephews and nieces so much. I had been with them nearly every day of their lives. The thought of not seeing them for two years was difficult to say the least. This verse told me the Lord would help me endure all challenges, including being away from my best friends. He had brought me through hellish torment before, and He would get me through every trial and difficulty till the 'morn' that I will see the 'angel faces' of my nephews and nieces 'smile'. He will continue to help me until I see Him as He is. I know that for those who put their trust in Jesus Christ, and "...keep (His) commandments and endure to the end (they) shall have eternal life, which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God." (Doc. & Cov. 14:7)

Here is a beautiful version of this classic hymn. Lander, WY: Prayer of the Children is coming soon...stay tuned! 

Shhhh! Don't Say That Word...

Trials, disappointments, sadness, sickness, and heartache. These things, which we are all prone to experiencing, can be summed up into one word, which may be a bit of a taboo word for some: Adversity. 


It comes from different sources, whether that be our own prideful disobedience (my default setting), or the natural results of life. However it may come, it is how we respond to adversity that determines whether it brings us closer, or further away from God. I love the words of Walt Disney on the topic: "All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you."

Here are a few words from members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on their views of adversity.


Elder Wahl (LDS missionary): "Adversity helps me to be humble. It helps me remember that it's the Lord on whom I must rely."




 Dani (recent convert): "I think what has helped me most to get through the hard times is knowing that what I live through is nothing compared to what Jesus did for us. He suffered so that we can live with God one day."

Dana (lifelong member): "I'm grateful for adversity because it drops me to my knees. I've learned to love my Father more in my struggles, to trust him more in my adversities, to feel his love more in my challenges, than I ever do during the good times. In fact, it keeps my heart open and humble and full of love and charity. Sometimes when things are good, I'll skip along my way with a little "Fa la la la la" in my step and just kinda oblivious to life. Adversity slows me down and shakes me a little as if to say, "Focus up, girl!" The best part is that I've learned to feel every great and wonderful and desirable feeling even in the midst of great difficulty."

One response to adversity should be constant-we must trust in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. No matter what our struggle may be, God will help us through it. The Prophet Alma taught, "Whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions, and shall be lifted up at the last day" (Alma 36:3)

I know that scripture is true because I have experienced it for myself. You can do it. You can make it through whatever adversity you now face. You will be able to look back on this time in your life and smile. The lessons you are learning will prepare you to meet and overcome more adversity in the future. Trust in God, and let the peace flow in.

More Than a Mighty Change of Hair...Part 3!!!

I was pretty hesitant to share this part of the story because it is something that I have held very close to my heart. It's gotten me through very difficult times and has pushed me to never return to where I was. I have prayed about it, and feel that it can be helpful to someone. So...

Beautiful St. George, UT

It was a tradition in my family that my siblings wrangle up their spouses and kiddos and head down to St. George, Utah to turkey it up at my parents. I love St. George so much because this is where my spiritual rebirth began to take place.The house was just starting to get packed as we awaited our feast. I was still really sick and not feeling my best. But I had to put on a good show, because it was time to be Uncle Elder Ika.

I have the greatest nephews and nieces anyone could ask for. They are my joy and happiness. Being away from them while serving a mission is definitely in the top three most difficult things I have had to go through. I have always been close to them. They were my first reason that I wanted to change and be better. It's because of the love I had for them, and them for me.

At the end of a very tiring and physically trying day, we set up shop in the living room to watch a movie. I had my little sweet pea (one of my nieces) as well as her two goofy brothers. We popped up some corn and started to watch the movie "Meet the Robinsons". We laughed and had a good time all the way through it. I remember how happy I felt as I listened to the laughs of these little tikes that I love so much. I remember their smiles and the hug that my little sweet pea gave me right before she fell asleep in my arms. The movie was just about to a close when I realized that my two nephews were asleep as well.

I was about to get up and turn the movie off, but a song started to play. I love music, and it didn't sound too bad, so I decided to listen to it. Here are the lyrics:

Let it go,                                                               Let it slide,                                                      All of my regret

Let it roll right off your shoulder                            Let your troubles fall behind you                     Will wash away some how
Don't you know                                                     Let it shine                                                       But I can not forget
The hardest part is over                                        Until you feel it all around you                         The way I feel right now
Let it in,                                                               And I don't mind
Let your clarity define you                                    If it's me you need to turn to
In the end                                                            We'll get by,
We will only just remember how it feels               It's the heart that really matters in the end

The lowest of low...

As I heard the words to this song, I felt something burning within me (nope, not heart burn). I was enveloped in love. I looked around me and saw three little angels, my two nephews and my niece. I felt a greater love for them than ever before. I now know that I was surrounded not only by those visible angels, but also angels unseen. I know my nephews and nieces who hadn't been born yet were there. My Grandparents who passed away years earlier, as well as many others, came to buoy me up.

In that moment, I knew the hardest part was over. I knew that I could put all the negative behind me. It was at that moment that I knew that all of the regret, disappointment, shame, guilt, sorrow, and every other thing that was weighing me down, could be washed away. I didn't understand how, but I knew that I would find out. I prayed and thanked God for my nephews and niece. I prayed and thanked Him for everything. I gave the most sincere prayer of Thanksgiving I have ever given Him.

To happier than I have ever been!

 A few years later and Pow!, here I am. I'm a missionary from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. My life was transformed. God changed my life and gave me what I always wanted: true peace and lasting happiness. He continues to do that for me. I know that God can do the same for you. He will help you to overcome any weakness you have. He loves you. Don't take my word for it. Ask God what He can do for you.

Don't You Quit!!!

Sometimes, life is tough. No, it's a lot more than tough. In fact, I often times get slapped so hard upside the head that I don't know which direction is up anymore! Albeit, I bring most if not all of my trials and difficulties upon myself through impatience, pride, and selfishness. Regardless of how opposition comes into our lives, what are we to do? When the burdens of life, with all it's twists and turns become more than we can handle, how do we keep from crashing? I testify that "for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, there are better days and good things to come."

 

No matter what our problems may be, it is the Savior and His teachings, the Gospel, that will help us the most. If we will learn to "trust in the Lord with all (our) heart(s); and lean not unto (our) own understanding..." the Lord will "direct (our) paths for good."(Proverbs 3:5-6) It may be difficult, but we must never quit or give in. I know from experience that there are better days and good things to come as I continually embrace the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I'm able to learn, even if it's slowly, to let go of impatience, selfishness, and pride. Great things lie in store for you as well! So embrace it and be happy!

To learn more, click HERE

Apostasy? Dispensations? What?...

God reveals His Gospel through Prophets. He has done this since the beginning of time. We read about it in the Bible. Did God love those people more than He loves who live in the modern day?




To learn more about truth restored visit MORMON.ORG

Thank You Kindly Jesus!

I've been a bum lately. Why? Because I have been so ungrateful. I've been ungrateful to my family for the support they give me. I've been ungrateful to my fellow missionaries for the great friends they are. I've been ungrateful for the trials that I have been going through, which I know will make me stronger. I've been ungrateful to the Lord for all the blessings He gives me. I'm so pumped to repent!!! I'm going to start on my repentance right now by saying that I am grateful for my family, friends, and especially to the Lord for all that He has given me. Check out this video to see what random people on the streets of New York are grateful for.

 

What are you thankful for?

Mormon.org/family

Ryan 'Willie Mays' Hayes: Til' We Meet Again...

Ryan Richard Hayes-Miss ya buddy.

This past week, I received the sad news that one of my best friends from my childhood passed away suddenly and unexpectedly. So many things run through the mind when something tragic like this happens. My first thoughts turned to his parents, especially his dad Sean. Ryan is the light of Sean's life. He was his pride and joy. My heart goes out to his family and friends, and all who have been affected by this great loss. I just wanted to share a few of my memories of my brother from another mother, Ryan Hayes.

I have seen many Facebook posts and the like talking of how great of an athlete Ryan was. Saying that he was a great athlete is an understatement. He was one of the best to ever come out of Sandy, Utah. He was the game changer in many of our football games. A great memory I have is from our Alta Hawks days years and years ago. We were getting pummeled, and we could not get the ball moving down the field. Running the ball was our bread and butter, because Ryan was our half back. We stuck to the running game, but could not get the ball in the end zone. Ryan was so frustrated after a few attempts of getting to the line of scrimmage and then being tackled by a swarm of defensive players. He came back to the huddle and looked at me and started yelling "I can't do this all myself! Open the hole!!!". I was ticked off at first, but I then realized what he was saying. He was a great athlete, but he still needed the team (specifically us fat lineman) to block for him so he could have a chance to get the ball rolling. He got us fired up, and then we got that ball rolling. McDougal and I opened up a hole, and after he got a few yards pass the line of scrimmage, it was the 'Willie Mays' Hayes show. He darted off, made a few cuts, broke some tackles, and we were able to score and get on the board. Even though he was a phenomenal athlete, he understood that there is no 'I' in 'Team'. He built up his fellow team mates and was a leader that we all looked up to.

A few years later in life, Ryan, myself and my friend Josh were going through some pretty tough common family troubles. I will never forget the help that he gave me. He was always there, willing to help out in any way he could. Whether it was a phone call to go and hang out (and by hang out I mean chase the girlies), or just an invite to go and eat some grub with him and his Dad, Ry was always reaching out to try and help me. He had such giving heart. He would always ask me if I was doing OK. He worried about his friends and he wanted to see them happy and smiling. That was one of the things he did best. He could get the room laughing in no time. He helped me to get through that difficult phase of my life, and for that I will be forever grateful.

I remember seeing him just before I left to come out here on my mission. He looked so good. He looked better than I had seen him in years. He had so much life in his eyes. I told him I was coming on a mission, and he reacted in a way I didn't expect, although I should have. First off, Ryan was not a member of my church. While growing up, he and I actually made fun of the "Mormons" a lot. I thought he was going to crack the same old jokes and give me a hard time. After I told him what I was doing, he looked me in the eye and said, "I'm so happy for you man. Your going to be great out there. Don't forget me while your gone." I let him know that I would be praying for him and that I would see him when I got back.

  I have thought of him often while I have been out here. I was looking forward to the day when I would get off my mission and be able to see him. Now, I am going to have to wait for a little while to make that promise come true. I know that I will see him again. I know that with all my heart. I know that God loves him, and is taking care of him right now. I won't forget Ryan and the incredible person he is. I won't forget the love, respect, friendship, kindness, laughter, and hope he shared with me.

I love ya Ryan. I'll see you again someday. My life is better because of the friendship we shared.

Am I crazy, or just stupid?

I'm a little bit of both! But that's an entirely different topic. If you asked me five years ago if I thought that Joseph Smith was a Prophet, I would have told you he was false. I fought against the church that he established bitterly, and would have no part in it. Today, I declare that Joseph Smith is indeed a Prophet of God. Through him, Christ restored His church, and the complete availability of His Gospel to the Earth. What changed my mind? The Book of Mormon.

Confuzzled & Don't Know What To Do? Well.......

What do I do?

Where do I run?

Why am I fearful?

Is this the one?

Why would He lead me here?

Where do I turn?

What is the truth,

For which I yearn?

Who has the answer?

He, only one.

But can I trust Him?

Follow His Son?

 He will answer.

He does care.

How can I know it?

One simple prayer.



 

"And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost.

 And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things.''-Moroni 10:4-5

My Mom is cooler than your Mom!

Mom with her youngest grandchild

"The holiest words my tongue can frame,

The noblest thoughts my soul can claim,

Unworthy are to praise the name

More precious than all other.

An infant, when her love first came,

A man, I find it still the same,

Reverently I breathe her name,

The blessed name of mother"
By George Griffith Fether

Don't try and compare, it just doesn't work out. We could argue about this all the day long. My Mom is the best. That's a fact. How do I know this to be true? How have I come to this conclusion? I could tell you but it's science so you wouldn't understand. Haha! OK, OK. I'm just kidding. I know there are a lot of great Mothers out there. My life has been greatly influenced not only by my own Mother but myriads of others. To all you wonderful women I say Grazie mille! But to my beautiful Mother, what can I say? Words cannot express the love I have for her. I look at her and see a woman who has had so much opposition in her life, yet she has continued to push forward and overcome. What is my Mom to me? She is diligence. She is love. She is patience. She is charity. She is kindness. She is so funny. She is goodness. She is all that and so much more. I love you Mom. Thank you for it all. Thank you for holding my hand leading me to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Thank you for being patient with me as I put you through hell before (and probably still after) I received my testimony that the Restoration is true. I miss our car rides with good vibes and talking about life. Tomorrow I get to skype home, and it's going to be great to see and talk to you. I love ya Mom! Your the best!

Yes, I was a Nanny

If someone was to ask me what I was doing on any given day before 24 March 2010 (the day I left on the mission), a safe bet would be that I was with my niece's and nephew's. They are my everything. It all started when I held my oldest nephew Parker for the first time almost 14 years ago. The relationships I have with them give my life so much meaning and fill it with some of the greatest joys I've experienced. Each one of them saved my life. That's the honest truth. It's because of them that I pulled out of the funk I was in for 10 years and decided that I needed to be a better person. I first changed for them. They have taught me so many valuable lessons. It was the 9 months I spent right before coming on the mission being a "nanny" that I learned the most.

After getting active in church again, I had difficulty deciding whether I would come out on a mission or not. After getting my Associates Degree I came to decision making time. I knew I did not want to continue on at the same school for my Bachelors, so I needed to decide if I would go on a mission or continue in schooling elsewhere. After much prayer and fasting, I knew that I needed to come out. I had some things to take care of before I could go, so I decided to move to my brother's house in the Salt Lake area. It was after bumming around at his house that I kind of fell into watching his kids while he and his wife were at work. I had a 3 month old bouncing baby boy that I cared for from morning until between 3-5 pm as well as the other four at various different times in the day. My love and appreciation for the sacred trust of being an uncle grew more and more over the 9 months I was privileged to spend with them while I prepared to come out.

Today is a sobering reminder of what I left behind. One year ago today, I came out on the mission. Today is also OJ's 2nd birthday (my youngest nephew...he's in the picture on the left). The greatest obstacle I have faced while being out on the mission is missing him and my other nephew's and nieces. There was one day in particular, the hardest day of the mission for me, that I wanted to go home and see them because I missed them so much. I tried to put it out of my mind. I tried to just work through it, but none of it helped. I went into a room and just sobbed and sobbed. For anyone who knows the type of relationship I have with my nephew's and nieces, they can understand how difficult being away from them is for me. I was praying for help and guidance, and this scripture came into my mind. It is Alma 7:11-12 and it is talking about what Jesus Christ would do for each of us.
"And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions...of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains...of his people.

 12And he will take upon him.... their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities."

I remembered this scripture and was reminded that Jesus Christ took upon himself all things, even when I have a case of the wheepies and am missing the fam. With this reaffirmed knowledge, I was able to get out and go to work trusting that I will be able to see my family soon enough and that He would make sure they are ok. It always gives me comfort to know that we are only away from our loved ones for a little while. Christ gives us the opportunity to have our families be forever and eternal. I know that is true, and I will do all that I can to make sure that that happens for my family. I am out here on a mission working to bring that same possibility to the people of Montana and Wyoming. It's a great day to be a missionary!

To learn more about how families can be forever, click here.

Music on the brain...Part 1:

Another post about music! It's amazing to me how stirring & powerful organized tones & sounds can be in our lives. It's fascinating to observe how music can change our moods, feelings, & attitudes towards commonplace occurrences. If we listen to angry & aggressive tunes, we tend to be contentious & combative ourselves. If we fill the air waves with positive & uplifting melodies, our moods and minds will be more harmonious for ourselves and those around us. We truly do get what we put into life, & the refrains we sing have a prodigious affect on what we get back. That's why we as missionaries are encouraged to use the Hymns of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints everyday in our proselyting efforts.

The Lord has made clear His feelings toward music. He states in the Doctrine and Covenants "For my soul delighteth in the song of the heart; yea, the song of the righteous is a prayer unto me, and it shall be answered with a blessing upon their heads." Hymns have a profound way of instructing us on becoming more like our Savior. In the introduction of the LDS Hymn book, the First Presidency of the Church wrote, “Some of the greatest sermons are preached by the singing of hymns. Hymns move us to repentance and good works, build testimony and faith, comfort the weary, console the mourning, and inspire us to endure to the end.” I am grateful for Hymns in my life. The promise of hymns moving us to repentance, building faith, inspiring us to endure to the end & so on have all been evident in my life. For the next few posts, I will be writing about some of my most treasured & favorite hymns & share my feelings & testimony of how they have helped me in my life. Stay tuned! 

"Don't let this man control you!"

A few weeks ago, as my missionary companion and I were using the computers at a local college campus, we had a run in with a fiery fellow named Sean. He came up to Elder Krambeck and started to rant about all the 'signs of the times' and went off on various conspiracy theories. Elder Krambeck was in a pickle, so I interjected by simply asking, "What's up?" Sean looked at me with blazing eyes and said to Elder Krambeck with his voice a-booming, "Don't let this man control you!" It was quite an amusing experience.

It has got me thinking though. I for one have questioned the faith I was born into for a very long time. I saw the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and all church's for that matter, as a ploy for control and power. All those 'thou shalt nots' seemed to me a mere stratagem for someone to gain supremacy; not a way to inner peace. I looked at the church's of the earth and thought to myself, "Nu uh. You ain't gonna fool me. I won't follow blindly and be controlled." Luckily, Heavenly Father fulfilled His promise that "the haughty shall be humbled" (2 Nephi 20:33). And oh boy was I humbled!

After years of doubting and nay saying, my new found compelled humility led me to start putting the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the test. I started praying and doing some of the 'thou shalts'. I learned from experience that  the Lord doesn't want to control us through obedience, but He wants to bless us for it. He promises that if we are obedient to Him that He will give us blessings in our lives. In fact, He is bound to bless us if we are obedient (Doc. & Cov. 130:20).

We don't however, have to follow thoughtlessly. We as members of His church have the principle of Intelligent Obedience. That is, we don't have to follow Him blindly or out of fear of punishment. He wants us to be obedient of our own free will. We need to gain our own witness, or belief, that the commandments really come from Him and help us live happier lives. To obtain this witness, we have to use faith. We have to have a real desire, and we have to be willing to do the work necessary to know these things.

We can know for ourselves that the commandments are there to make us free from the consequences of sin, not just imperious rules from an abstract God. We can pray and " ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true" and He will answer us and tell us. When we know that they are true, we will want to live them for the rest of our lives. The commandments will be a lighthouse as we make our way across the stormy seas of life. We will grow stronger, feel greater peace, and increase in spirituality. We will show our true love and devotion for Jesus Christ as we keep His commandments (John 14:15).

But don't take my word for it....put it to the test!

Car Rides and Good Vibes

No, I did not get along well with my parents growing up. I was a punk. Plain and simple. I "knew" better. They were out of touch. They couldn't possibly understand what I was going through. I was wrong. Yes Mom, I know you want to hear it again: I was wrong (I'll tell you in person when I see you in a year ;) This enlightened train of thought all started in the winter of 2007 with a couple three hundred miles and some alone time with my momma (yes, a couple three).

My parents love to be with their grand kids. Only problem is, they live 300 miles away from them. This led to an almost weekly excursion from the wintry warmth of St. George Utah to the frigid frost of Herriman, near Salt Lake City. Our car rides were usually a marathon of Simon and Garfunkel/Beatles albums to help pass the time. Amidst the Funk, my Mother found some way to really pry me open and get me to start talking to her for the first time in my life. I found myself talking about everything. Over time, I spilled my guts about the mistakes of my past. Huge burdens were lifted off my shoulders as I asked forgiveness for the torment I put Mom through in my earlier life.

These conversations with my Mom sparked something in me. I wanted to talk and get things off my chest. I wanted to give up all the stuff I had bottled up inside. The discussions with my mom left me wanting for something more. I still felt a little empty. That's when I finally decided to put prayer to the test. I started to get on my knees and talk to Heavenly Father, and really talk. I told Him everything (which at the time seemed ridiculous, because He knew it all already). I prayed “with all the energy of heart” (Moroni 7:48). I felt that emptiness replaced with the love of God more and more. I expressed the shame, guilt, sorrow, remorse, and heartache I felt because of my past. Prayer strengthened my faith, which led to repentance. I was finally able to feel the redeeming power of the Atonement.  Over time those very same feelings have been replaced with peace, happiness, and resolve to do better. I am forever grateful for the healing principle of prayer. To learn more about how Heavenly Father feels about prayer, click HERE.

So, your a missionary. What's that like?

So......My name is Elder Ika. I am a full time missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I have been given the opportunity to use facebook and blogger to help me keep in touch with the people I have met.

For two years I serve away from my home sharing the things I know to be true with the great people in Montana and Wyoming. I have been serving now for about 9 months and have loved it. It's the most fun I have ever had! Something about getting out and serving others really brings out the fun in life.

That's all for now. More will come soon.